Crenshaw's Books & Decks

If you are a woman (sorry Barbie it is not you) you have told yourself one of these lies at a certain point in your life and, by doing so, you've self-sabotaged yourself successfully. Congratulations, you feel miserable. No prize for you, you just pay the price.

Written by a female coach,  Big Lies... offers a concise evaluation of fifty-nine self-lies, limiting beliefs and distorted views of your female self and your self in general. They deal with your worth, your body, self-care, success, money, love, relationships, authenticity, and your spirit. The message is, see them as lies, because they are, and do not use them to justify your situation, your misery or your empty life.

Examples of big fat lies are: I am old, I cannot do X, I have to please everybody to be liked, money is bad, it is OK living beyond your means, you have to fake who you are to get a man, love is sacrificing yourself, better be polite than authentic, grieving openly and strongly is wrong, and so on. 

Many of these beliefs could be applied to men, as well, but others are specifically female. Also, some of these big fat lies are obvious, but others are not, and are the ones that I like the most, because they are not socially popular or accepted and will help you to separate hay from grain. Having said this, even the obvious ones are important to be highlighted because the truth is that a ridiculous amount of women are spending tons of money to "improve" themselves and "gain confidence" by increasing the size of their boobs, cutting and modifying pieces of their body flesh, and faking what they are not, instead of focussing on inner, ethical or intellectual growth. 

I found some of the "lies" on spirituality redundant. Being not religious or not spiritual is perfectly OK, as long as you have ethics. The power and value of behaving ethically is overseen too often despite being more universal than any religion out there, and applying to any religion out there. I am a bit sick of religious spiritual people who say and preach that they have strong morals or look for people with strong morals and then disrespect me or treat me in ways I consider totally unethical. Spirituality is fine if you need it. It is fine to believe or practice any religion, but being agnostic or atheist with a good set of ethics is something to be proud of, not a macule on your soul, mind you.     

The book is easy to read, and a quick read as well, as every single big fat lie has a mini chapter devoted to it, so you can read them easily while commuting. 

This is a sound book, but this is not the book of a psychologist. See it for what it is.

An entertaining good-hearted read overall.